Tuesday meant back to work.\u00a0 I had been shopping online to see what kind of dolly or cart I might get to lug around my work equipment on those days when I have a lot to carry.\u00a0 I wasn’t really seeing anything ideal, but I figured I’d just have to settle.\u00a0 I hadn’t gotten anything yet, so I just left my computer at home that day.\u00a0\u00a0 It’s not so much that my equipment itself is heavy, but my equipment PLUS my computer bag is heavy.\u00a0 But then as I was carrying my equipment bag into work, I realized that it plus my purse (sad right), while probably not 25 lbs (I haven’t weighed it and I’m a poor judge), was a heavier combo than I thought.<\/p>\n
I parked close to the entrance (which is mildly controversial, but I’ve decided I’m now entitled for health reasons), and carefully carried my stuff inside.\u00a0 I worked the morning, then I had another late-afternoon patient at my other office.\u00a0 So I packed up again and decided to run some errands in my down-time.\u00a0 I went to Sam’s to stock up on a few items, but first things first, I had to pee.\u00a0 So I went to the bathroom and was dismayed to find MORE blood.\u00a0 Still only a trace.\u00a0 I was so happy to know what it was, but it just doesn’t stop being disconcerting.\u00a0 Especially since I hadn’t bled since Saturday around noon-ish.\u00a0 I did my shopping–also found a dolly while I was there.\u00a0 I don’t love it–actually it’s one I was looking at on Amazon.\u00a0 But the price was right.<\/p>\n
So I finished my business.\u00a0 It was just normal stuff, nothing rigorous.\u00a0 Went to the bank, then back to work.\u00a0 Stopped in the bathroom (TMI alert)–more blood.\u00a0 Actually, more blood than I’ve seen in this entire ordeal, but this time it was kind of an orangey red.\u00a0 Definitely more than Saturday (which prompted the ER visit), but still not a lot.\u00a0 It was the first time there was enough that I could have stood to have a pantyliner, but it wouldn’t have been near full.<\/p>\n
I sent my obgyn’s office a message, but being later in the afternoon, I figured I probably wouldn’t hear back until the next day.\u00a0 I was afraid it was indicative of an active bleed or a new bleed, but she reassured it me that it’s not unusual.<\/p>\n
Actually here was her message:<\/p>\n
Hi Erin~
\nIt’s not uncommon to have some more spotting or light bleeding as that area heals. If the bleeding becomes heavy, where you are saturating a heavy menstrual pad every 45 minutes, then we would want you to go to the ER for assessment. Please contact me at the end of the week to let us know how you are doing, or sooner if you have any further questions or concerns.<\/p>\n
Honestly, I *hate* the “fill a pad in under an hour” stipulation because yeah duh if I were on the verge of death, I would go to the ER.\u00a0 Okay I know of two people who have met that criteria, and one was truly on the verge of death, and the other had a very rough miscarriage.\u00a0 (Edit: I later thought of another person or two to meet this criteria, and I’ll just say those weren’t good situations either.)<\/p>\n
I can’t say I’m unhappy with my care.\u00a0 I just can’t decide if it’s more a matter of 1) they really do believe it will be fine (I think they probably do), 2) they don’t want to make a deal of it so then, in turn, I won’t make a deal of it (but oh hey I am going to anyway b\/c there’s blood coming out of my vagina). And 3) all the scans in the world won’t change the outcome, so why the expense (because it may keep me sane-r).<\/p>\n
After this episode, mulling it over, and talking to some ladies on the forums, I need to figure out a way to discuss with my doctor that I appreciate frankness and lots of details.\u00a0 Maybe they are truly telling me everything.\u00a0 But I don’t enjoy being told “what I need to know.”\u00a0 Because I’d rather be the judge of that.\u00a0 If I don’t need to know it, my brain will purge it.\u00a0 Hahaha I already know that’s no problem.\u00a0 Even if I do need to know it, my brain my purge it anyway.\u00a0 I just feel less stressed, more at ease (I guess that’s the same thing), and more prepared with MORE knowledge.\u00a0 Even if it’s not pleasant.\u00a0 Unpleasant surprises are worse than unpleasant non-surprises.<\/p>\n
I think maybe I’m reading into this too much.\u00a0 Maybe it is not a big deal, and my doctors are making it out to be not a big deal because…it’s not a big deal.\u00a0 It’s just difficult because of how things went the last time.<\/p>\n
I actually mentioned something like this to the ER doctor (I forgot to mention this when I wrote up my ER saga–and I know, as long as that was, it’s hard to imagine ANYTHING could have been left out of that).\u00a0 Being pregnant, especially being pregnant with a complication (if I can even call it that), it’s like I have rational Erin and irrational Erin constantly at odds.\u00a0 To expound, it’s kind of like on TV shows and movies when you have the angel on one shoulder and the devil on the other shoulder battling it out.\u00a0 I like to think of myself as a rational person.\u00a0 I work in health care, and my education is in science.\u00a0 So I will think things through rationally, but I can’t claim to be rational all the time in this situation!<\/p>\n
Anyway.\u00a0 Last thing that happened on Tuesday was I got my bloodwork back.\u00a0 I got an email, so I could log in and view it.\u00a0 So I guess that solves the mystery of what the other vial of blood they took at the ER (besides the one where they ran a beta) was for.\u00a0 It was a number of blood clotting things, all of which came back normal.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Tuesday meant back to work.\u00a0 I had been shopping online to see what kind of dolly or cart I might get to lug around my work equipment on those days when I have a lot to carry.\u00a0 I wasn’t really seeing anything ideal, but I figured I’d just have to settle.\u00a0 I hadn’t gotten anything […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[4],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/babyg.brainstormwarning.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/809"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/babyg.brainstormwarning.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/babyg.brainstormwarning.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/babyg.brainstormwarning.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/babyg.brainstormwarning.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=809"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"http:\/\/babyg.brainstormwarning.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/809\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":823,"href":"http:\/\/babyg.brainstormwarning.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/809\/revisions\/823"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/babyg.brainstormwarning.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=809"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/babyg.brainstormwarning.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=809"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/babyg.brainstormwarning.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=809"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}